Chasing History: Exploring My Ancestral Roots - Blog Post #35
By Tonya Graham McQuade
It’s been a while since I’ve added a new post, and with the holidays approaching, I thought I’d take a break from my “historical ancestor” posts and write about someone much closer to me: my mother. I still intend to get back to my posts exploring my Scots-Irish ancestry and other family roots, but I’ve decided here to honor the person who taught me how to celebrate the holidays and to love Christmas and all its adornments: Dorothy Ann (Wagner) Graham.
Anyone who knows me knows I love Christmas. Each year I write an annual Christmas poem to update friends and family on the “news” of our year, and each year I ask my husband and son (and this year my new son-in-law) to help retrieve the 16+ boxes of Christmas decorations from the attic so I can begin transforming our home into a Christmas Wonderland. We now put up three Christmas trees each year (one real and two fake) in different parts of the house, mostly to help hold our many ornaments which no longer fit on one tree. Why so many? Well, there are many ornaments marking special milestones (birthdays, anniversaries, graduations, weddings), special interests of the kids from various years as they were growing up (ballet, soccer, Harry Potter, Narnia, Barbie, Spongebob, etc.), and childhood art projects and photos.
Even more, however, come from various locations around the world. Each time we travel somewhere, ornaments are typically the “souvenirs” I choose since they can fit in our carry-on luggage, and I love reliving the memories each year as I decorate our tree. Quite a few of those souvenir ornaments are from from travel adventures with my mom - to Prince Edward Island (where we went on the "Anne of Green Gables" tour and learned to crack and eat whole lobsters in 2005), the Ashland Shakespeare Festival (where she and Anna I saw a couple plays and had lots of fun exploring the boutiques in town in 2012), the Statue of Liberty and Ellis Island (from when Anna and I visited New York City with my mom over Spring Break in 2014), Skagway (from when we took a family cruise to Alaska for my mom's 70th birthday in 2012), St. Thomas (from a Disney Eastern Caribbean Cruise for my parents' 50th anniversary in 2015), Disneyland (from a family Thanksgiving celebration in 2018), and Grand Cayman (from a Disney Western Caribbean Cruise for my mom's 80th birthday in 2022).
There are also many special keepsake ornaments made by my mom through the years - some of which I remember helping to make and giving as gifts to various family friends. You see, one of the things my mom and dad both taught me was about the joy of giving homemade gifts as I watched them give ornaments, wood projects, homemade jams and jellies, pies, and other holiday crafts to family members and friends. They also taught me to enjoy opening up my home and showed me how to be a good host, especially at the holidays. From them I learned that such get-togethers did not have to be fancy affairs - that sometimes, the most fun get-togethers are casual, spur of the moment, and involve games, music, and lots of merriment and cheer.
My mother was also a master cookie baker - her “magic cookie tray” never seemed to be empty, unlike the one at my house - lol - much to my children’s chagrin. Frosted sugar cookies were one of her specialties, as were many different types of pies - pumpkin, pecan, and cheesecake being my favorites, with my husband Mike preferring the pomegranate, apple, and berry pies she would make. And while she has had to slow down on her pie making, and making lots of homemade pies is not one of the traditions I have kept up, both my daughter and my nieces have picked up the slack and become the pie makers and cookie bakers for many of our recent holiday celebrations. Anna was especially excited at one recent Christmas to get a special binder of recipes from Grama.
I also watched my parents send out Christmas cards every year - and I have been doing the same now for many years. This year marked my 32nd year, in fact, of sending out a Christmas poem along with my cards. I know many have stopped sending out cards, and it seems I get fewer every year, but it’s still something I enjoy doing. And it’s something that continues to be important to my mom - even though writing has become more difficult for her, and sending out cards is a much more time-consuming process than it used to be.
This year, I know, my mom is having a harder time getting into the holiday spirit as she deals with more health issues and less energy. It’s hard to see her slow down. But as I put up the many decorations around my house, I enjoyed thinking of all the special memories behind so many of the Christmas decorations she has made for us through the years - not only the ornaments but also the stockings that hang on our mantel and the pillows on our couch. I also took notice of how many others she has purchased for me through the years, including a Nativity Set from Mexico, the Advent Calendar that hangs on our door each year, and most of the “Precious Moments” ornaments that now hang on our “Precious Moments Christmas Tree” in the entryway (my mom bought these after I chose "Precious Moments" as the theme for Anna's bedroom when she was born).
